On Cleaning, Part I: the Bathroom

Cleaning the bathroom is my least favorite chore. It almost always has been. When my sisters and I were children (are we still children, Mom?) we took turns doing chores, and I feel like I always ended up in the bathroom. Of course, I didn't, but selective memory works for stories like this.

Even now, the bathroom is an abomination. I cannot stand the site of dirt, dried toothpaste, soap grime, and other unmentionable *yucks*. The smell of a bathroom, too (and I really don't mean THAT smell), but the smell of lotion and soap and air freshener and shampoo and on and on. It's overwhelming.

And what is MORE overwhelming? The smell of bathroom cleaners. They all nauseate me, but especially the all in ones that contain some awful mix of ammonia and bleach that sends poison darts right into your tear ducts. Heaven forbid they get on my skin, because I turn red from the irritating chemicals and my fingers feel like chalk for several hours.

To top this misery off, today was a clutter clean-out day. The sink area was beginning to look like a drop-off site for CVS leftovers. I promised Jimmy-boy that I'd clean it. And he laughed. LAUGHED, I say.

Lessons learned from today's mis-adventure:

1. Medicine has expiration dates. I never really looked before, but I had some going back to 2003. No wonder I don't always feel better.
2. Lotions also have an expiration date. It may not be stamped on the bottle, but the separation or discoloration of liquid is a good indicator.
3. Band-Aid wrappers can be deceiving. What actually looks like a complete Band-Aid may actually be only an empty wrapper that is closed but not sealed.
4. The toilet is in organic shape, with bowels and elbows.
5. Just as the elbows of children must be cleaned....
6. White vinegar is an excellent cleaner. It's organic, streak-free, and leaves a beautiful shine on metal parts.
7. Spilled face cleaner, even if it's a whole bottle on the cabinet floor, can be cleaned with water and elbow grease. Lots of water and elbow grease.
8. Only a person with two or more heads needs two brushes and two combs.
9. A bad hair day will not be solved by buying a new hair product, using it once, and then dumping it in the cabinet.
10. The best cleaning product ever invented by man (even if not environmentally friendly) is the toilet wand that clicks to pick up a brush and clicks to dump it in the garbage. No smelly cleaner, no fuss.
11. Aim.

That is all.